bloggity blog, poetry

phantom limb, mine

Today I lay in bed
And watched the light outside my window fade
Grey white clouds like wolf’s fur
So cold it felt like snow
I hear my pack howling
But I cannot get to them

My brain or more accurately my meninges
Ache and thud and ache
My pia mater tells my arachnoid membrane to go fuck itself
and my outerdura mater sits with its fingers in its ears
Trying to block them both out
My subarachnoid space and cerebrospinal fluid try to separate the three fighters but to no avail

I stare out my window, heart howling
And watch as the grey turns to blackness

Moths beat their little bodies against my glass
Mercilessly trying to get in
But all I want to do is get out
They don’t know how good they have it
Although, if I got my wings back
I would probably head straight back to the flames
Hopefully, I will see the moon first

What you can never truly have
Cannot hurt you
Even if you feel it missing
Like a phantom limb
Mine to never have


26 thoughts on “phantom limb, mine”

      1. No!!! You have to tell me! Now everyone I respond to I’m gonna be like “Count? Is that you, dude?”
        I think I may know who it is anyway…
        The kids are good… the youngest just lost another tooth… I think they are just pulling them out now…

        How’s the Countess?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. *cuter pouty face with big Disney eyes*
        Pwease, Count sir, pweease?

        I keep them all in a box… it is actually really creepy… but the kids now know there is no tooth fairy… cause I failed at parenting.


    1. Yes! So, next time you get a headache you will know it is actually and ache in those membranes or it is from your sinus… And you know because I am a big nerd. lmfao Just don’t ask me how to pronounce them because I don’t remember…
      My brain has other stuff in it too… but I think yes, it is mostly made up of those things.

      Liked by 1 person

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